Funeral Home Quotes

I've got no idea when I am going to retire. Whenever they pick me up and take me to the funeral home, I guess.

I really wanted to be on Six Feet Under as a corpse. That would be hysterical.

I scrolled on down to the obituaries. I usually read the obituaries first as there is always the happy chance that one of them will make my day.

My uncle is a Southern planter. He's an undertaker in Alabama.

I've always said I would want to be a funeral director if I wasn't an actor.

I take classes to be a mortician.

Ranger picked up and there was a moment of silence as if he was sensing me at the other end, taking my body temperature and heart rate long distance. “Babe,” he finally said. “Do you know the slum apartment building Bobby Sunflower owns on Stark?” “Yes. It’s on the same block as his funeral home.” “That’s the one. I’m going in to look for someone. If you don’t hear from me in a half hour maybe you could send someone to check.” “Is this a smart thing to do?” “Probably not.” “As long as you know,” Ranger said. And he disconnected.

Our apologies, good friends, for the fracture of good order, the burning of paper instead of children, the angering of the orderlies in the front parlor of the charnel house.

'Graveminder' is about a mortician, a young woman with commitment issues, a dead teenager, and a town called Claysville where the dead don't always stay dead.

A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table.

Don't think I'd really want to be a mortician. Wouldn't be getting much back.

On 'Six Feet Under,' I never really had much to do with the actual business, with the embalming stuff. That wasn't really my role.

I have nothing against undertakers personally. It's just that I wouldn't want one to bury my sister.

One of the things that was most shocking to me about starting to work in the funeral industry is just how industrial the environment is.

I am a mortician who tells you that you don't necessarily need a mortician.

I grew up in a funeral home, born and raised, and everyone was always like, 'Well, what was that like?' and I was like, 'It was normal', because it's all I knew.

My mom works in funerals, and my dad works at Burger King.

I played a funeral convention once. York Casket Company pays well, in case anyone's wondering!

I grew up in a funeral home. Both my parents were morticians.

The funeral business is so manipulative emotionally. I would want to be thrown into the sea or burned - something that's not a big hassle.

We have 62 counties in New York State and each has its own system of death investigation.

Nine Years Under is a sparkling debut--- brimming with love and bursting with life. Booker's Baltimore is equal parts The Wire and The Cosby show. She doesn't shrink from the realities of life in an inner city funeral home, but she is also a loving witness, documenting the big hearted community that takes care of its own. Told with compassion, wit, and good old fashioned story telling, Sheri Booker gives us unforgettable characters who will make you laugh right up until they break your heart.