Wilson Mizner Quotes

The number one rule of thieves is that nothing is too small to steal.

I steal scenes, I steal opportunities. I am the ultimate thief. I got sticky fingers, man. They all call me The Thief.

I've definitely stolen a lot of things.

If it wasn't for pick-pockets I'd have no sex life at all.

Pickpockets either work alone or in pairs, or what is called a mob.

I now know how to steal a watch when someone's wearing it. It's an excellent talent to have.

I like playing thieves.

The trick is to steal big.

People love gentle larceny.

Galleries are easier to steal from than the Apple Store, maybe.

I don't think anybody ever saw anybody taking anything.

I never, ever would or did rob anyone in my life.

You have to steal a lot. You have to have a criminal mentality to be a film director.

I've seen looting around the world and thought I knew the best looters in the world. The Iraqis excel at that.

I've made an incredible amount of money stealing fans from homeowners.

You remember Huston's plan. I want it implemented on a thievery basis. God damn it. Blow the safe and get it.

There's always a little jump to your heart when you realize you've got looting.

Stealing was a rush to me, more about the feeling than the thing I was stealing.

I'm as wicked as Hitler's first born, cause of me, lot of old ladies purses gone.

...I just pulled a pretty big job and needed to hide out for awhile." "...Where's all the loot?" "That, as my cousin Nord would say, is where my improvised lie falls apart." Artemis put two and two together and arrived at a very unpleasant four. "You were here to rob me!" "No, I wasn't. How dare you?!

Vanz can't dance, but he'll steal your money.

I never stole nuttin' unless it began with an 'A' - A truck, a car, a payroll...!

PLUNDER, v. To take the property of another without observing the decent and customary reticences of theft. To wrest the wealth of A from B and leave C lamenting a vanishing opportunity.

If we steal a man’s purse we are thieves. If we steal twelve hundred islands, we are patriots. If you steal a man’s money, you will be sent to the penitentiary. If you steal his liberty, you will be sent to the White House.

It is criminal to steal a purse, daring to steal a fortune, a mark of greatness to steal a crown. The blame diminishes as the guilt increases.