Chuck Palahniuk Quotes

Tax day was yesterday. And marijuana growers are complaining that they can't write off a single expense thanks to federal laws. Well, apparently someone tried to claim the Phish tour as his home office and that's not going to happen.

All the big corporations depreciate their possessions, and you can, too, provided you use them for business purposes. For example, if you subscribe to the Wall Street Journal, a business-related newspaper, you can deduct the cost of your house, because, in the words of U.S. Supreme Court Chief Justice Warren Burger in a landmark 1979 tax decision: Where else are you going to read the paper? Outside? What if it rains?

Cholesterol to go with alcohol; all the bad things in English-speaking life end in -ol.

I have better use for my brain than to poison it with alcohol. To put alcohol in the human brain is like putting sand in the bearings of an engine.

Gotta love alcohol and sex hormones.

Alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, may produce all the effects of drunkenness.

Liquor - you can make it illegal but you can't make it unpopular.

I would be lying if I didn't admit there might be a scene in the movie where there might be alcohol in my system.

The first time I lose I drink whiskey, second time I lose I drink gin. Third time I lose I drink anything 'cause I think I'm gonna win.

I've often said to myself, "Thank God I can write, 'cause this is hilarious." I actually wanted to go into all that more in the book, but my editor thought it was too crazy.

There is not a single person alive who could keep a straight face and say "Oh yeah it's healthy, the reason I use drugs and alcohol and booze is because it's healthy!"

If you want to talk about distributing substances that are lethal, . . . let's be serious. Tobacco is far ahead of anything else. Alcohol is second.

O God, that men should put an enemy in their mouths to steal away their brains!" - Cassio (Act II, Scene iii)

Avoid alcohol as you would a loathsome disease. Beer will do to you what hard liquor will do. Each contains alcohol in varying amounts.

I think alcohol is a good drug for me when I'm writing. I don't think I've ever had a problem with it. I can stop for a few weeks, so I think it's okay. I don't think it's good for my liver, but I do love it. It's a huge part of my life, and it makes me happy.

Kids who drink alcohol, fairly regularly before they're 14 have a 48% chance... of becoming alcoholics.

Alcohol, contrary to instinct, is not the secret to happiness.

No matter who you are, if you have a $30 operating loss, you can carry it forward to the next year. And poor people do take advantage of that, also.

I didn't go to bars much. One drunken asshole was all I could handle and that was me. I wrote. I don't remember a lot of it.

Drinking every night because we drink to my accomplishments.

As for drugs, it annoys me that people think it's the worst thing in the world compared with, say, not paying your taxes. If you don't pay tax, you may be stealing from someone who needs an operation. As for me and drugs or alcohol: No thanks, I'm abstaining for a while.

I lived on rum, I tell you. It's been meat and drink, and man and wife, to me.

A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says "You've been brought here for drinking." The drunk says "Okay, let's get started.

I'm sure drugs and alcohol perhaps would inspire new thoughts, but it's certainly not something that I use as a tool or a mechanism to create.

Some American writers who have known each other for years have never met in the daytime or when both were sober.