Roxane Gay Quotes

In talking with people, don't begin by discussing the things on which you differ. Begin by emphasizing - and keep on emphasizing - the things on which you agree. Keep emphasizing, if possible, that you are both striving for the same end and that your only difference is one of method and not of purpose.

Most of us recognize how important it is to listen respectfully when our loved ones are talking; but we often forget that it is equally important to talk respectfully when they are listening.

I've always believed that a lot of the trouble in the world would disappear if we were talking to each other instead of about each other.

it’s important to make sure that we’re talking with each other in a way that heals, not in a way that wounds." - Barack Obama, 44th U.S. President

Disruption never helps your cause. ... It just looks like you're afraid to have rational discussion.

We cannot learn from one another until we stop shouting at one another - until we speak quietly enough so that our words can be heard as well as our voices.

Just open, honest communication is the best thing in the world.

Sometimes there is a greater lack of communication in facile talking than in silence.

Arguments are to be avoided: they are always vulgar and often convincing.

Trust leads to approachability and open communications.

You don’t have to be confrontational of aggressive to get to where you want to be or get people to do what you want to do.

We can argue and we can disagree, but we don’t need to poke our fingers in each other’s eyes in order to get our points across.

In a political struggle, never get personal—else the dagger digs too deep.

The most difficult thing to do is to communicate the positive.

Republicans - well, we're all part of the same family. We need to have some good disagreements with each other; we need to debate, but in the end, it's all about uniting, not dividing.

Look, yes, I'm a Muslim woman and I want to bring my community to the table, but I also want to make sure that I'm not being tokenized.

Normally, at a debate or a town hall, I would be quick to say to someone, 'That was rude,' or, 'We're going to try to keep it civil here,' or, 'Let's not have personal attacks.'

I've come to terms with the fact that standing and screaming in someone's face about how wrong they are is never gonna make anyone change.

If you let things devolve into a shouting match, then it's really difficult to have a discussion, a serious discussion.

'Free speech' isn't speech at all if it's being used without listening, attention, or care.

The key is that when we disagree, we really hear the other one out and agree that there is a more elegant solution than one of us 'winning.'

Even though I've had the odd terse word to say about Donald Trump, I still get invited to events at the U.S. embassy. I always attend, because as long as they're prepared to hear the opposite viewpoint, then I'll never miss that chance when I can.

The overwhelming majority of Americans want decent and civil political dialogue, and candidates for office and elected leaders must continue to call for calm and unity, even when there are intense differences of opinion.

When two friends are in the mood to chat, we have to go about it in a gentler and more dialectical way. By 'more dialectical,' I mean not only that we give real responses, but that we base our responses solely on what the interlocutor admits that he himself knows.

We must learn to talk with each other, and we mutually must understand and accept one another in our extraordinary differences.