Sylvia Day Quotes

A lot of people are afraid to face themselves, especially when something goes wrong. But that's important, because if something happens within a relationship, it could be how you're allowing someone else to treat you.

I realized I've spent all my life creating a past.

I'm sensitive, you know, about some things, and as some of my partners could attest to, incredibly insensitive.

Most of us are not real eager to grow, myself included. We try to be happy by staying in the status quo. But if we're not willing to be honest with ourselves about what we feel, we don't evolve.

Women, the way I see it, are very evolved people. They're more mature, they're more aware of their feelings, in touch with their feelings. They're connected to things that matter more in life. They know what's important. Men basically run around like idiots until we meet somebody who can show us that those things are important.

A lot of cases, what makes you an interesting and complex person makes you a really horrible person to be with romantically.

So many of us have not attended to the deeper issues in ourselves; in our minds, our hearts, and in our external manifestations that keep love at bay. We instead concentrate on making a list of what we're looking for in another person.

All our relationships, especially the deep ones, stir up the deepest issues for us that we need to confront and work with.

Much of the work of midlife is to tell the difference between those who are dealing with their issues through you and those who are really dealing with you.

Before I can face the future, I must first deal with the past.

Being by myself, that is to say, without a man - it's been a long time - is allowing me to know what it feels like - to live in my own skin, to remember what I miss and don't miss about a relationship.

Only he who can view his own past as an abortion sprung from compulsion and need can use it to full advantage in the present.

The past was always there, lived inside of you, and it helped to make you who you were. But it had to be placed in perspective. The past could not dominate the future.

A lot of my friends they call me 'the therapist'. They come to me looking for advice. I must be doing something right because they keep coming back. But I'm not very good at kind of looking into my own world and trying to pick apart what is really wrong and fix those things. I like to kind of shy away from certain issues and turn away.

Different things work for different people. One thing I've realized, though, is that the work that I've done on myself outside of my work as an actress has really allowed me to open up my mind. I think I understand my emotional state and my complexities now in a much clearer way, and I can put them to rest in a way that there's almost a catharsis that happens through the work, where I can do it and then find myself again.

all the advice you ever gave your partner is for you to hear

Catch up with your past, before it catches up with you.

Sooner or later, we must all accept the fact that in a relationship, the only person you are dealing with is yourself.

When emotional intelligence merges with spiritual intelligence, human nature is transformed.

Like most of the educated, I do harbor a fondness for the sins of my ignorant past.

When Nehemiah's heart was broken he paid attention to his broken heart.

Real transformation requires real honesty. If you want to move forward - get real with yourself.

Most people don't live aware lives. They live mechanical lives, mechanical thoughts - generally somebody else's - mechanical emotions, mechanical actions, mechanical reactions.

So you work on yourself as a gift to other human beings. Then you use every situation you have with other human beings as a vehicle to work on yourself by seeing where you get stuck-where you push, where you grab, where you judge, where you do all the stuff.

Our primary relationship is really with ourselves. Our relationships with other people constantly reflect exactly where we are in the process.