Phil Klay Quotes

I was a very defensive kid 'cause I was really sensitive underneath and didn't want people to know. So I came off as very tough and very angry.

Contempt is the weapon of the weak and a defense against one's own despised and unwanted feelings.

I was always the guy - out of insecurities, I was always making fun, even as a kid.

Art is based on emotion, but being macho is based on ego; the wall protecting that emotion.

I was a timid little guy when I was a kid. I used humor as a defense; I became the class clown. But deep inside, I felt real vulnerable.

Nobody's just arrogant. I've met people who are embattled and dismissive, but when you get to know them, you find that they're vulnerable - that that hauteur or standoffishiness is because they're pedaling furiously underneath.

When you're an insecure teenager, you build walls and defenses and masks, and those are incredibly satisfying to perform and chip away at. I mean, when I was an insecure teenager, you'd have had no idea what I was insecure about because I hid it so well. Only confident people are comfortable wearing their vulnerabilities on their sleeve.

It used to hurt me when people said I was hiding in Wales.

Hiding behind a tougher outer image as a teenager feels cooler and safer compared to admitting, perhaps, that you're the very opposite.

I've learnt to hide my tears on stage. They make people uncomfortable.

Men walk this tightrope where any sign of weakness illicits shame, and so they're afraid to make themselves vulnerable for fear of looking weak.

Our vanity is hardest to wound precisely when our pride has just been wounded.

People think I'm so strong, but I'm very shy.

We're all human beings, but some of us are more sophisticated at covering our flaws. We're just smart enough to lie to ourselves that everything is OK.

A lot of writers, probably because they're sensitive, which makes them want to be writers, have fears about their masculinity, so they overcompensate by having an interest in boxing and tough-guy things.

We keep secrets from people that we love because we're afraid of our own truth. I think sometimes we're afraid to hurt people, because you never know. I think we're afraid of what is, and what can't be.

I hesitate to use a pathologizing label, but underneath the so-called narcissistic personality is definitely shame and the paralyzing fear of being ordinary.

Everybody sees me as this sullen and insecure little thing. Those are just the sides of me that I feel it's necessary to show because no one else seems to be showing them.

I think all jocks have a sensitive side. It's just, will they show it to anybody? Will they let their guard down and stop being tough and the cool jock guy around their friends, or just relax? I don't know if it's best to say opening up, but just relax and really say what you're actually thinking, and not what you think people want to hear.

As a kid, I would push my shoulders forward in order to hide my heart from being hurt.

Why should I? No one would wish to hurt me.

When I am talking to people who I feel don't like me or are mean, I get really shy, and I kind of curl up personality wise.

I moved around so much when I was younger that I sort of had to have this type of exterior; you know, I was afraid of getting hurt.

You can't allow yourself to be vulnerable.

We're socially constructed to hide our flaws, and that breeds pain for a lot of people.