Jonathan Carroll Quotes

How easy it is to think well of ourselves. Until the moment is upon us, we can never be certain.

'Tis very great pity that they who are so apt to over-rate themselves in smaller matters, shou'd, where it most concerns them to know, and stand upon their Value, be so insensible of their own worth.

Who laughs less than feminists?

When a woman tries on clothing from her closet that feels tight, she will assume she has gained weight. When a man tries something from his closet that feels tight, he will assume the clothing has shrunk.

To measure up to all that is demanded of him, a man must overestimate his capacities

I would like to break out of this "dark, brooding" image, cause I'm actually not like that at all. In Ireland, brooding is a term we use for hens. A brooding hen is supposed to lay eggs. Everytime somebody says "He's dark and brooding" I think: "He's about to lay an egg".

Nobody knows diddly. They just think they do. And the people that think they know the most know the least.

Everybody thinks himself so well supplied with common sense that even those most difficult to please. . . never desire more of it than they already have.

If you think everything you've done is great, you're probably dumb.

Why must she dress that way? I think she's confused about her gender.

It's not what you know, it's what you think you know.

We think we know what we are doing. We have always thought so.

If you think you are not conceited, it means you are very conceited indeed.

Women," Mat declared as he rode Pips down the dusty, little-used road, "are like mules." He frowned. "Wait. No. Goats. Women are like goats. Except every flaming one thinks she's a horse instead, and a prize racing mare to boot. Do you understand me, Talmanes?" "Pure poetry, Mat," Talmanes said, tamping the tabac down into his pipe.

I think we overrate ourselves in terms of our abilities and capacities. I mean, just because you can build a really swell bridge doesn't, to my way of thinking, mean that you're an advanced civilization.

Since we think about ourselves so much of the time, it is comforting to assume ... that we really know the score.... [But] this is not an easy assignment. [As] Santayana wrote, 'Nothing requires a rarer intellectual heroism than willingness to see one's equation written out.'

I used to think that the brain was the most wonderful organ in my body. Then I realized who was telling me this.

Sometimes I dislike women, I dislike us all, because of our capacity for not-thinking when it suits us; we choose not to think when we are reaching our for happiness.

If people think I'm a laid-back guy, that's their mistake.

I think there is a major difference between actors and actresses. All of the men I've worked with have been really difficult, whereas the women have always been extremely cooperative. I began thinking about that, and I think it comes down to a question of comfort with vanity.

Men read maps better than women because only men can understand the concept of an inch equaling a hundred miles.

Most fools think they are only ignorant.

Love is like liquor, the drunker and more impotent you are, the stronger and smarter you think yourself and the surer you are of your rights.

Be very slow to believe that you are wiser than all others; it is a fatal but common error. Where one has been saved by a true estimation of another's weakness, thousands have been destroyed by a false appreciation of their own strength.

I have no illusions about my looks. I think my face is funny.