Randall Munroe Quotes

I have earned enough to take it a bit easier now.

It's funny because unlike back in the seventies when I made hardly any money, today I could just live off the past if I wanted to. I have no interest in that.

The only thing I ever wanted to do is never have to work a day in my life.

My goal was never to win awards. Mine was let me get to a place where I don't have to work. I don't have to do anything I don't want to.

When I was a kid, maybe 11, I remember saying, 'When I grow up I wanna have enough money to buy a really cool car, because I won't.'

Comedy did a lot of things for me. I mean, 'SNL'? Not too bad. Not too shabby with this comedy thing. I have really worked on my comedy and really upped it some notches.

I'm not Russell Brand or Ricky Gervais, but I have enough money that I don't have to work. Most people who've done what I do don't have that.

I'd love to retire in terms of not having to go to work anymore and earn a living.

I never do anything to make money. I do make money, but that's because I do something. Big difference.

What makes Broken Lizard, I think, is our timing.

If you're able to put humor into something, just like it happens in life, you might get away with it.

The best bloggers have tongue planted firmly in cheek.

I got a lot of great years on WWE TV and I made a lot of money throughout the business. So, if I don't do anything else, I'm good. I can kind of do what I want to, which is a very nice feeling to have.

I love following my friend Tony Zaret on Instagram. He's a super funny comedian who makes these parodies of memes, and Instagram skits.

One of my favourites on Instagram is @dublin_zoetrope. He does these musical theatre/Meryl Streep/Glenn Close memes that are truly hysterical. He'll take a regular photo of them and create an entire storyline, and it makes me cackle out loud.

I don't want to rap forever. But I want to be rich forever.

Whatever I did, I always gravitated toward trying to be funny. If I was with friends, we were joking around. If I wrote for the newspaper, it would be a humor column. If I acted, I wanted to do comedy.

I think 'Deadpool' worked because of what it was. I think 'Deadpool' worked because it was funny. I think 'Deadpool' worked because it didn't take itself seriously. That's why it worked as an R-rated film.

Woody Allen's 'The Complete Prose' - It's just the best selection of comic writing by one author. You know it's good comedy when you get quite demoralised about yourself.

Political cartoonists get hung up on daily deadlines and the front page. The worst thing you can do is open up the newspaper and ask, 'What's funny about this?'

When I worked on 'The Daily Show,' we had some puppets made of myself, John Oliver, and Jon Stewart. When I left the show, I stole the puppet. I took what was rightfully mine.

Being on a major label is like living at your friend's parent's mansion: It's a lot nicer than any apartment we could afford, and the fridge is always full of food.

Using humor as a wedge into different kinds of stories is my go-to. I think anything I do would have some sort of streak of humor in it.

I find that I'm extremely unattracted to anything that's humorless. There is writing that is entirely serious, and it doesn't ring true to me, because I think, oftentimes, life is very, very funny. Even the worst, most humiliating, savage disappointments in retrospect have elements of bleak humor.

Justin Halpern tosses lightning bolts of laughter out of his pocket like he is shooting dice in a back alley. In one sweep of a paragraph, he ranges from hysterical to disgusting to touching--and does it all seamlessly. Sh*t My Dad Says is a really, really funny book.