Charles Caleb Colton Quotes

Better to go than sit around being a terrible old bore.

It is a triumph of life that old people lose their memories of inessential things.

I know I'm getting old because there will be times when I'm not even doing anything and I'll think, 'I need to go wipe my ass right now.'

You know, as you get older, the first thing you lose is memory. It seems to be happening with me.

A man growing old becomes a child again.

There are three signs of senility. The first sign is that a man forgets his theorems. The second sign is that he forgets to zip up. The third sign is that he forgets to zip down.

Develop your eccentricities while you are young. That way, when you get old, people won't think you're going gaga.

Age carries all things away, even the mind.

I can see myself as a very old man in a terrific wheelchair. Only, I won't be photographing the tree outside my window, the way Steichen did. I'll be photographing other old people.

When you get old, it's hard to tell what's memory and what you've kind of created in your head as memory, you know?

Discussing how old you are is the temple of boredom.

I think repeating yourself is a sign of old age, telling the same joke again and again. Especially if they're jokes that don't make people laugh.

When you become senile, you won't know it.

When you get older, two things happen to you. You begin to lose your hearing, and I forget what the other one is.

As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two.

As you get older, you worry about your memory.

When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it.

My grandfather said, "When you become senile, you won't know it."

I am getting to an age when I can only enjoy the last sport left. It is called hunting for your spectacles.

When the age is in, the wit is out

Alas, how right the ancient saying is: We, who are old, are nothing else but noise And shape. Like mimicries of dreams we go, And have no wits, although we think us wise.

Anyone who claimed that old age had brought them patience was either lying or senile.

The older I get, the less I remember.

There is not a man who does not get senile by the time he reaches sixty. And when one thinks that he will not be senile, he is already so.

In Truth I found myself incorrigible with respect to Order; and now I am grown old, and my Memory bad, I feel very sensibly the want of it.