Justin Bieber Quotes

Puns are the droppings of soaring wits.

I have wit in my work and a sense of humor, but I do not use irony in any way.

I think puns are not just the lowest form of wit, but the lowest form of human behavior.

A pun is not bound by the laws which limit nicer wit. It is a pistol let off at the ear; not a feather to tickle the intellect.

The pun exists in a social and political void, caring nothing for the issues of its day, content merely to display itself in its small cleverness.

Puns are little "plays on words" that a certain breed of person loves to spring on you and then look at you in a certain self-satisfied way to indicate that he thinks that you must think that he is by far the cleverest person on Earth now that Benjamin Franklin is dead, when in fact what you are thinking is that if this person ever ends up in a lifeboat, the other passengers will hurl him overboard by the end of the first day even if they have plenty of food and water.

A pun is the lowest form of humor—when you don't think of it first.

My way of joking is to tell the truth. That's the funniest joke in the world.

I have a really dark, rich, thick sense of humor.

Humor writing is something that comes naturally to me.

I'm a plethora of stolen jokes and kitschy references.

Wit is the epitaph of an emotion.

My dad's sense of humor was direct and sometimes surreal - his quick wit is well known amongst our family and friends. He raised me on Spike Jones records and W.C. Fields movies, and his sense of humor fell somewhere in between.

Wit is educated insolence.

Irreverence is easy - what's hard is wit.

Impropriety is the soul of wit.

We've always had a philosophy that we would always go wherever the joke is.

I like really bad puns - proper, red-top, nasty puns - I find them funny.

Jokes are unanswerable objections.

Every witticism is an inexact thought; that which is perfectly true is imperfectly witty.

I could dance with you till the cows come home. Better still, I'll dance with the cows and you come home." Groucho Marx was never one to pass up an opportunity for a play on words and this occurs in his dialogue of the 1933 film Duck Soup.

Chic Murray once told me he fell in the street, and a woman said to him, "Did you fall?" He said, "No, I'm tryin' to break a bar of chocolate in my back pocket."

True wit never made us laugh.

My puns are not trivial. They are quadrivial