Amy Hempel Quotes

Interestingly, the best way to promote intimacy is to demand it.

Love is an attempt at penetrating another being, but it can only succeed if the surrender is mutual.

You can only love and be loved to the extent that you know and are known by somebody.

Relationships in general make people a bit nervous. It's about trust. Do I trust you enough to go there?

A real conversation always contains an invitation. You are inviting another person to reveal herself or himself to you, to tell you who they are or what they want.

I'm constantly astounded by the way people talk so openly to someone they don't know. They clarify in their own minds what is important to them, discover another person has similar problems, and create trust and even a friendship.

I feel like the more I share, the more relatable I am.

There are very few things that I don't talk about - even my relationships.

Me being so open just helps other people. People feel like they know me so much that they can talk to me all of the time about really personal things. Sometimes it's really nice and comforting. It depends on the person, whether they're creepy or not.

How do you open up? I didn't know how to.

Always before, I just said no, left it solidly there. I waver now. I want to share everything with him. Want to know what he knows, feel what he feels, share the same space he's in.

Open to others as you would like them to open to you.

I don't have any fear of intimacy, but rather thrive on it, which is rare in a public person.

Fear is the great enemy of intimacy. Fear makes us run away from each other or cling to each other but does not create true intimacy.

In a relationship when things are really great you don't need to say anything and just enjoy the other person. Sometimes with a couple, it gets dark and you don't know what to say and that silence can last all day. Other times you don't want to stop talking because you don't want to lose one another.

Intimacy, as I am using it, is sharing my reality with you.

I like, though, that people have a hunger to connect with other people. They're desperate to know that you're not lying to them or misleading them.

Love is very dangerous if you just have love and don't have the ability to be lovable.

In a relationship you have to open yourself up.

Through my research, I found that vulnerability is the glue that holds relationships together. It's the magic sauce.

That's one of the great lies of intimacy, to pretend you know everything - you cannot. No matter how close you've been, over however many years, there remain secrets. I think we all know that - that you don't tell everybody everything.

Trust is the glue of life. It's the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It's the foundational principle that holds all relationships.

Trauma happens in relationships, so it can only be healed in relationships. Art can't provide healing. It can be cathartic and therapeutic but a relationship is a three-part journey.

If you are careful with people, they will offer you part of themselves. That is the big secret.

Never assume that the guy understands that you and he have a relationship.