Judith Martin Quotes

No, you're not allowed to be bossy when you're married. You have to learn compromise, and compassion and patience.

In my experience with women that I've dated and my wife now, is you have to know what they care about. And even if you aren't a huge fan of it, you still have to have interest in it and it has to be genuine because women do it for men all the time.

It's better to be happy than right. Practice saying "Yes, dear" and "You're Right". The more you say those words, the happier your marriage will be.

I've tried to recognize my wife's individuality, her personality, her desires, her background, her ambitions.

If I hadn't read all of Jane Austen and DH Lawrence, Tolstoy and Proust, as well as the more fun stuff, I wouldn't know how to break bad news, how to sympathise, how to be a friend or a lover, because I wouldn't have any idea what was going on in anybody else's mind.

We run into some pretty tough arguments sometimes, but the idea is that at the end of the day, my wife and I realize that we'll always be holding each other's hand.

A sense of humor is great - it goes a long, long way in a marriage.

The key to staying together is making sure you guys like each other and need each other.

In romance, we feel the need to zoom in and expound on our partner's foibles in intimate detail; in friendship, we tend to do the opposite, avoiding confrontation through fear, lethargy or both.

Only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. One is to let her think she is having her own way, and the other is to let her have it.

Marriage is a reflection of your life in general: how you treat people, how you argue, how secure you are in your own thoughts. How vehemently do you argue your point of view? With what disdain do you view the other's point of view?

Compassion, not passion, keeps a marriage together.

A good marriage is different to a happy marriage.

She was a genius at listening.

We don’t need a speaker; we need a listener!

A relationship succeeds when obstacles are met with communication and resolution. A relationship flourishes when we take the beloved as our teacher. Shared goals create a transformative, interwoven path.

I have to be in tune. All the time. I have to be in tune with my husband, where he is, how he's feeling. I have to be in tune with where my family is.

Let your wife win all the battles, and you'll win the war.

One of the things I say is, 'You cannot control your spouse, but you can influence your spouse.' And one of the ways to influence your spouse is to make sure you are meeting their need for love.

My wife has taught me about unconditional love. When there's a conflict, there's never a thought that we won't work it out.

If you want to improve a relationship, it's not that you demand your spouse to change. You have to ask, 'Where did I fail in this relationship?'

I'm a pretty good listener.

Communication is extremely important in any relationship - it makes the relationship that much healthier.

Any relationship has its strengths and weakness.

I've seen my parents' long and successful marriage. I have never seen them argue or fight with each other, and the reason behind that is, I think, is that they always communicated with each other.