Sloane Crosley Quotes

I'm shy, but I'm not clinically shy. I don't have social anxiety disorder or anything like that. I more have a gentle shyness. Like, I have a little trouble mingling at parties.

It might sound so stupid, but guys do not hit on me. I'm not really sure why, but it's very rare that a guy will ever come up to me and be like, 'I'm going to lay down my game right now, and you're going to like it.'

When I turned about 12 or 13, I realised that being funny wasn't about remembering jokes. It was about creating them.

I tend to be sort of quiet and shy and awkward in social situations.

I'm not a real social person - I'm shy - and a lot of the business is just social.

A girl came up to me in a bar and said she wanted to be my apple pie. I wish I'd said something cool, but I was stunned.

I don't do a lot of dating. I guess it's kind of like everyone is always trying to set me up with somebody, so we go out and hang out at a club or somewhere. I think dates are weird.

It has always been a wonder to me where my conversational power has gone: at the present time, I cannot impress the most ordinary men.

I am very bad at schmoozing, and I'm not overtly charming in social situations.

I was kind of shy as a lad, and a lot of things that made me laugh, I found, did not make other people laugh.

I am afraid I am totally hermetic to social games in general.

Sometimes I feel a bit socially disconnected in terms of being a little bit gullible about how people interrelate emotionally.

Restaurants are minefields for the socially inept

I've always been a social network retard, even before there was a social network. People would say, "You want to go to this party and do some networking?"

I don't get intimidated. When I'm on set, I never really get intimidated by people. But in social situations, it's weird sometimes. You don't want to seem like you're kissing somebody's ass because they're a celebrity.

introductions are hard to come by when your natural state is shyness

I can't give parties. It's so hard. When I want to call somebody up for dinner they think I'm using them or something. I just can't stand it.

I find it very hard to believe that people would prefer an awkward picture with me than a normal conversation.

It’s funny now, trying to socialise with people. There’s this cautiousness about people which I just find really weird.

You bet being funny helps accomplish things. I've always maintained that people don't realize how many brain cells it takes to be funny. And politics ought to be fun -- after baseball it's our next favorite national pastime.

It is always chilling, in friendly intercourse, to say you have no opinion to give.

I wasn't a social drinker. I used to say that I didn't want to go to bars because they were full of assholes like me.

I don't think he likes girls", I said. "Or boys. Look at the horror on his face. He doesn't look like a people person.

For me, and I suspect a lot of socially awkward people, dealing with people face-to-face seems really traumatic. Particularly if you have massive sweating issues, and particularly if on top of that you have quite smelly sweat that smells like onion soup.

Whenever I have talked to anyone at too great length, I am like a man who has drunk too much, and ashamed, doesn't know where to put himself.