Irvin D. Yalom Quotes

It is not insult from another that causes you pain. It is the part of your mind that agrees with the insult. Agree only with the truth about you, and you are free.

He learned to live with the truth. Not to accept it, but to live with it.

Find a person who has embraced anger, and you will find a person with a wounded ego.

Whenever you think something or some person is ruining your life, it's you. A victimization mentality is so debilitating.

I try to be sensitive, but the atmosphere I create is very supportive. One overriding premise of the series is that guilt is not heritable. It's good to know about them, but you are not responsible for them. You don't have to apologize for them. It's a process of knowing, and the more you know, the richer the sense of yourself. The firmer your foundation as a human being is

Sometimes it's a little overwhelming to take on other people's stories, that's just the kind of person I am, maybe I'm empathetic to a fault, I internalize a lot, so it can be a bit hard sometimes, but I understand that that's what they need, and if I can do it, then I'll do it, but if I can't, then I'll try to take a knee.

To endure oneself may be the hardest task in the universe. You cannot hire a wise man or any other intellect to solve it for you. There's no writ of inquest or calling of witness to provide answers.

A man can take only so much. Even a phony man like me.

But let no person say what they would or would not do, since we are not judges for ourselves until circumstances call us to act.

Remember, no one can hurt your feelings without your permission

Happy people build their inner world; unhappy people blame their outer world.

It's hard work being a person, you have to do it every single day.

Whatever happens around you, don't take it personally... Nothing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves.

How could I do it, how could a person go that low? And I understand your question, to which I reply, Are you kidding? That's nothing. I'd been much lower than that. And I expected to see myself do worse.

The hardest thing to remember is that what we each really want is the truth of our lives, good or bad. Not rocking the boat is an illusion that can only be maintained by the unspoken agreement not to feel and in the long run it never really works. Let go of saving the boat and save the passengers instead.

I love the truth. Whether it's painful or wonderful, it always widens my perspective and changes me. It helps move me forward.

Everyone has their set of problems and I'm certainly not going to sensationalize mine or try to evoke pity or sympathy out of people because I don't think they warrant that sort of thing. That's my private karma that I have to work out.

I take responsibility for my successes as well as my failures. But when I look at my professional mistakes, I'm always left with the feeling that maybe I should have done more.

When in doubt, tell yourself the truth.

It is the thoughts and intents of the heart that shape a person's life.

I hope I'm an integrous person who cleans up their messes when I've been a jerk.

Three enemies that will weaken your ministry over time: Self-indulgence, bitterness, and carelessness. Strong people discipline their desires, restrain their reactions, and keep their commitments.

Taking on responsibilities that properly belong to someone else means behaving irresponsibly toward yourself. You need to know where you end and someone else begins. You need to understand boundaries. You need to know what is and is not up to you, what is and is not in your control, what is and is not your responsibility.

You learn in life that the only person you can really correct and change is yourself.

...nobody can stand truth if it is told to him. Truth can be tolerated only if you discover it yourself because then, the pride of discovery makes the truth palatable.