Terry Pratchett Quotes

Pure air and water, cleanliness, a proper diet, purity of life, and a firm trust in God are remedies for the want of which thousands are dying; yet these remedies are going out of date because their skillful use requires work that the people do not appreciate.

I didn't wash today. I wasn't dirty. If I'm not dirty, I don't wash. Some weeks I don't have to shower at all. I just groom my three basic areas: teeth, hair, and asshole. And to save time, I use the same brush.

Cleanliness is next to Godliness, and some people do the same by their religion.

I've never had underwear of any kind, anything that you have to wash.

Real religion is no religion at all.

Even in 'Khatron,' I used to wash my own clothes.

Mrs Joe was a very clean housekeeper, but had an exquisite art of making her clenliness more umcomfortable and unacceptable than dirt itself. Cleanliness is next to godliness, and some people do the same by their religion.

All I ever needed to know I learned in kindergarten. Share everything ... Don't hit people ... Clean up your own mess.

Look after your laundry, and your soul will look after itself.

I don't really see the point in washing your hair. If you don't care if your hair's clean or not then why would you wash it?

And of course there is nothing better than wearing the same T-shirt for days and not brushing my hair for weeks.

I only shampoo [my hair] once a month.

Well, have you ever thought of bathing?' I asked, turning away. 'No one wants to hire a wizard who smells worse than their outhouse. And who knows what creatures are living in that hair?

I like people who are slightly unhygienic. A little grubbiness isn't so bad. BO chic it should be called.

Religion! Is what you hear at church religion? Is that which can bend and turn, and descend and ascend, to fit every crooked phase of selfish, worldly society, religion? Is that religion which is less scrupulous, less generous, less just, less considerate for man, than even my own ungodly, worldly, blinded nature? No! When I look for religion, I must look for something above me, and not something beneath.

George Bush says he speaks to god every day, & Christians love him for it. If George Bush said he spoke to god through his hair dryer, they would think he was mad. I fail to see how the addition of a hair dryer makes it any more absurd.

I'm sure you have heard it said that appearance does not matter so much, and that it is what's on the inside that counts. This is, of course, utter nonsense, because if it were true then people who were good on this inside would would never have to comb their hair or take a bath, and the whole world would smell even worse than it already does.

Many people are willing to be God-centered as long as they feel that God is man-centered

Many people have just enough natural religion to make them immune to the real thing.

I am constantly amazed when I talk to young people to learn how much they know about sex and how little about soap.

Religion has accepted the monstrous heresy that noise, size, activity and bluster make a man dear to God.

Curiously, the most serious religious people, or the most concerned scholars, those who constantly read the Bible as a matter of professional or pious duty, can often manage to evade a radically involved dialogue with the book they are questioning.

I need to brush my teeth. And I need a shower." He grinned, hopping off the bike. "Now that is an invitation.

People no longer try to decipher the mystery of life but choose instead to be a part of it.