Jimmy Carr Quotes

The nightmare is you spend the rest of your life being funny at parties and then people say, 'Why didn't you do that when you were on television?'

I never really watched much stand-up growing up. I just was not really that into it. But I can say I honestly fell in love with it the second I touched the microphone. It was like this weird thing where it's like, 'Oh, yeah, this is what I'm supposed to do.'

I just always loved comedy and I really wanted to be good at it. And it was heartbreaking, 'cause I started and I wasn't good at it. I was only 17-years-old, so I had a lot to learn about life in general. But I just kept on trying. I was young enough and stupid enough and I had no other choice. I had nothing else I was good at.

I'm always doing comedy and will never hit up a 9-to-5 desk job.

If I wanted to take a more activist or journalistic slant in work, I should probably just go be an activist or a journalist. But I'm happy being a comedian.

I never knew if I would get my own show, but I knew I loved stand-up.

I have no qualifications to do anything else and there weren't any formal application forms you had to fill in for stand-up, so I thought I'd give that a twist.

I used to do a lot of comedy. I don't know what happened. I think it's my face.

I'm more interested in producing than acting.

I'm proud to say that I've never had a normal job. I started doing stand-up when I was in high school, purely as a measure to never get a proper job.

I have no intention of retiring; I can't imagine not doing stand-up. That's where I started and where I'll be.

You know, it wasn't even that I'm a funny guy, I just loved stand-up comedy and I wanted to do it. It was one of the few things in my life that I knew I was going to be able to do, and I also felt as though I'd be able to do it the way I wanted to do it.

I think for something like law or medicine you really have to love it and I didn't love it.

I never want to give up stand-up. Because I still get a thrill out of it.

My wife asked me if I ever thought I would ever retire from stand-up. And I thought about it, and I was like, 'No, because it's my job; it's what I do, and I enjoy it.' It's still the most challenging thing for me to do.

I could have made it as a singer, but I went with acting - surrendered to it, in a way.

I'll be doing stand-up for the rest of my life. The opportunities that it grants you can't be denied. Stand-up is both the hardest thing I do and the thing I enjoy most.

I probably wouldn't be doing comedy, if it wasn't for the fact that I was doing stand-up and getting a few gigs, while I was also applying for law internships and getting absolutely nothing.

I never thought about 'being' in comedy when I grew up, because I didn't know it was a real job. But looking back, it's the only thing I ever really cared about.

I was very afraid of failure because if you fail at something you love, then you ruin what you love.

A lot of people get into stand-up as a back door into acting or something. But I really like writing jokes and telling jokes.

I've been performing stand-up comedy for ten years, it's what I love and will always do.

My family were nothing but pleased when I told them I wanted to be a comedian.

I love comedy and I hope I never stop doing it.

I'm a comedian, and I decided I wanted to be a comedian when I was eight years old watching old Saturday Night Live episodes. I never decided to be a rapper because I'm not a rapper.