Judith Martin Quotes

It is impossible to practice parliamentary politics without having patience, decency, politeness and courtesy.

Good manners sometimes means simply putting up with other people's bad manners.

I have a respect for manners as such, they are a way of dealing with people you don't agree with or like.

Civility does not mean surrender.

Among well-bred people a mutual deference is affected, contempt for others is disguised; authority concealed; attention given to each in his turn; and an easy stream of conversation maintained without vehemence, without interruption, without eagerness for victory, and without any airs of superiority

Grace, respect, reserve, and empathetic listening are qualities sorely missing from the public discourse now.

I'd rather be a good guest in someone's home than tell them I don't like their food or make fun of them.

Love thy enemies, it says in the scriptures. My foster mother always added, "At the very least, you will be polite to them.

Never insult anyone by accident.

You know, you pick and choose your battles.

The strong should always permit the weak and aggrieved to talk, to bluster, and scold without taking offence; and if we had so acted, and exercised proper skill in the management of our affairs, Mexico and ourselves would, by this time, have quietly and peaceably settled all difficulties and been good friends.

I don't think it's an incredibly radical premise to try and have sympathy for someone who has made a mistake.

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.

I don't want to go about offending people; that's not my plan.

To disagree, one doesn't have to be disagreeable.

Politeness is only one half good manners and the other half good lying.

You should always leave the party 10 minutes before you actually do.

If we judged everybody by the stupid, unguarded things they blurt out to their nearest and dearest, then we wouldn't ever get anywhere.

The test of a man or woman's breeding is how they behave in a quarrel.

When suave politeness, tempering bigot zeal, corrected 'I believe' to 'one does feel'.

Politeness, n: The most acceptable hypocrisy.

Women of quality are so civil, you can hardly distinguish love from good breeding.

Give the other person the ability to save face…. Don’t rub his nose in things.

Minimum information given with maximum politeness.

Liberalism: To let things slide for the sake of peace and friendship when a person has clearly gone wrong, and refrain from principled argument because he is an old acquaintance, a fellow townsman, a schoolmate, a close friend, a loved one, an old colleague or old subordinate. Or to touch on the matter lightly instead of going into it thoroughly, so as to keep on good terms. The result is that both the organization and the individual are harmed.