Workplace Conduct Quotes

If your boss gets drunk and offers to photocopy her posterior, do not helpfully suggest pressing reduce 75%.

Charlie Sheen called his boss on 'Two and a Half Men' a 'Jew ki**' and expected to go back to work. That’s crazy. If you could do that and keep your job, then everybody would do it.

I'm always afraid that I'm being unprofessional, yet I continue to sign all my e-mails 'xoxo.'

Once I will warn you, and then I will fire you! I have a zero-tolerance-plus-one policy for gossip. I will teach you once, and then I will fire your butt.

Why should how I act in my workplace be any different from how I interact with my family at home? It's making sure the company runs on feminine principles where the major ethic is care.

If you are to be employed by the BBC, you must promise not to get drunk…. You look as if you will be washed out of poetry by whisky.

I'm not a social rider. Strictly professional.

Call on a business man only at business times, and on business; transact your business, and go about your business, in order to give him time to finish his business.

I'm not in the business of being "friendly."

Nothing personal - I am just doing my job.

You always have to remain professional. I have always done so.

I strongly believe in work ethics and when certain people do not follow the procedures, I'd rather step back and weigh my options.

Are you running an airline or a whorehouse?

The accusation 'unprofessional' means 'You did not behave like a machine today.

I always ask candidates two things: 'How many times have you been fired?' and, 'Do you watch your clock when it's time to go? Do you look at your phone? Do you look at your watch?'

In my career I haven't been suspended much.