I'm horrible to live with. I don't clean. My clothes end up wherever I take them off. I forget to flush the toilet.
Kings and philosophers defecate, and so do ladies.
It is better to have a relationship with someone who cheats on you than with someone who does not flush the toilet.
"Civilization rests on two things," said Hitzig; "the discovery that fermentation produces alcohol, and voluntary ability to inhibit defecation. And I put it to you, where would this splendidly civilized occasion be without both?"
Russians don't take a dump, son, without a plan.
No one goes to the toilet in novels. You'd think none of us had bladders.
Everybody looks at their poop.
Australia is an outdoor country. People only go inside to use the toilet. And that's only a recent development.
Now, as husbands go, I have to admit I did all right. Joe is unquestionably handsome, doesn't leave ragged toenail clippings scattered about the house, and has never once, in nearly five thousand days of togetherness, left the toilet seat up.
I found out why cats drink out of the toilet. My mother told me it's because the water is cold in there. And I'm like: How did my mother know that?
No one is ignorant that our character and turn of mind are intimately connected with the water-closet.
I don't want to judge America. I love America. God bless America. There are so many wonderful things about America. The fork! But we are a little behind on the bidet situation. I'm willing to say that. Hopefully we'll get our act together.
The world is divided up into two kinds of people - those who look at their body waste in the toilet bowl, and those who don't.
There is an inverse correlation between the cleanliness of a bathroom and my 3-year-old daughter's need to move her bowels.
There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women.
You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.
