Yup, the toilet is my best friend before a show.
I dare not drink before a gig because I'll get tired and blow it. So I have to sit drinking tea in a caravan.
Nobody can understand the pressures of doing an hour-long TV show unless you've done one. Even when you're not on call, you still are working, learning lines, doing appearances, just tense.
The night before a show, I don't sleep. Really. I've been doing this for 30 years, and the night before a show, I still don't sleep.
I've tried every kind of bottled water, but Poland Spring is my go-to. I always have room-temperature bottles of it on side of stage for post-performance.
Playing a concert for 2 hours is pie. I would do that every minute of every day if I could. I love to perform. It's the 22 hours before the next show that kills you.
I remember playing the Royal Albert Hall, and a guy would say, 'Ten minutes to stage time,' and I'd get so nervous.
In a world of iPads and emails, nothing has really changed in the theatre. You still get in an hour early, do your wardrobe, put an old pair of tights under your wig, and you have, 'This is your call, Miss Jensen'. I got exhilarated by that.
My ideas for the next collection always happen a couple of months before the show. I have learned to shut up and not bother my assistants with it.
You'll almost encounter a superstition amongst musicians, people sort of go through strange rituals, what they need to do to write a song.
It's a good idea to shave for TV games.
I like to weed out the people who aren't going to enjoy me straight off the bat. If you look at all my specials, I do start more extreme and then, as I get into it, sort of at the three-quarter mark, I normally have a bit of pathos. Is pathos the right word?
For the cable news guest, nothing happens for a while until suddenly everything happens very quickly. After you receive your television face, you stand around for a while, ignored, until you're sat down at a desk and asked to argue with strangers.
We always had chocolates and my mother was careful to make sure they were unwrapped in advance so the paper wouldn't rustle in the middle of a performance.
It's not easy to do morning TV. A lot of people think you just show up and be yourself, but one of the hardest things to do is be yourself when the camera comes on.
During an early performance of 'Spamalot,' I left my regal gloves in the fridge to cool down and didn't remember them until I was on stage. They needed to be thawed overnight.
