False Attribution Quotes

Calling a tail a leg does not make it a leg.

I never said half the things I said.

People are inclined to say that I am Ramona. I'm not sure that's true, but I did share some experiences with her.

God heales, and the Physitian hath the thankes.

It had become usual to give Napoleon the Credit for every Successful achievement and every stroke of good fortune. You would often hear one hen remark to another, "Under the guidance of our leader, Comrade Napoleon, I have laid five eggs in six days" or two cows, enjoying a drink at the pool, would exclaim, "thanks to the leadership of Comrade Napoleon, how excellent this water tastes!".

The biggest problem I have in journalism is being quoted or misquoted and then being asked to defend something I haven't said.

Orthodox Christians have the habit of claiming all great men, all men who have held important positions, men of reputation, men of wealth. As soon as the funeral is over clergymen begin to relate imaginary conversations with the deceased, and in a very little while the great man is changed to a Christian - possibly to a saint.

Pride causes us to use our gifts as though they came from ourselves, not benefits received from God, and to usurp our benefactor's glory.

If you think I have the power to determine when people leave their spouses, you attribute far too much credit to me.

What happens often - although I'm not particularly a victim of this sort of thing - is that somebody will make a quote, or invent a remark and it gets printed, ends up on the 'net and it becomes currency. And some of them are so bizarre!

I did not become great by association of The Beatles! Beatles make Maharishi great? Pah! It is a waste of thought.

If you want to convince somebody, make up a quote and attribute it to some renowned authority …. People are incredibly gullible.

Attributing to anything or anyone more good than God has attributed to them is not a positive move, nor does it mean that you have done them any good. A single grain of truth is preferable to a bumper harvest of false imaginings.

Happiness is an imaginary condition, formerly attributed by the living to the dead, now usually attributed by adults to children, and by children to adults.

I have never seen any such quote anyplace, anywhere.

With no more than six levels of misquotation, any statement can be made to say whatever you wish.

People see your reviews sometimes, and it's so good that they think I wrote it. And I'm like, "OK, yeah, I wrote it. And I own the company that put it out."

The only thing Abner Doubleday ever started was the Civil War.

George Bush taking credit for the wall coming down is like the rooster taking credit for the sun rising.

Without solid connections between homicides, we may have the reverse problem of believing three local murders are the work of one serial killer when they may actually be the work of three!

There is no more dangerous error than that of mistaking the effect for the cause.

The trouble with being quoted a lot is that it makes other people think you're quoting yourself when in fact you're merely repeating yourself.

Bull markets go to people's heads. If you're a duck on a pond, and it's rising due to a downpour, you start going up in the world. But you think it's you, not the pond.

I confused things with their names: that is belief.

I'm not a writer, and I don't want there to be any mistake about that.