Weight was the thing I hyperfocused on. It went from me losing a few pounds to slowly over time losing more and more weight and becoming more and more focused on it.
When you go further and further into starvation you chose yourself, your mind becomes totally obsessed with not eating. It's like a religion where everything is sinful, and there is a heaven at the end where you are thin and don't need energy anymore.
My body started to shut down. I got really, really ill. When you're starving yourself, you can't concentrate. I was like a walking zombie, like the walking dead. I was just consumed with what I would eat, what I wouldn't eat.
Anorexia is pernicious and not something which goes away overnight.
It not unusual for women with anorexia to suffer heart attacks.
A mother who is obsessing about being thin and dieting and exercising is not going to be a very good mother.
I used to weigh myself every day at a certain time of day. Then I would write down the number and measure my body fat. It wasn't a healthy way to live.
Anorexia was there for me before I got into modeling, but because of the arena and the demands, the disease really got out of control for me. It's like being an alcoholic and going and being a bartender.
