Comedy Audition Quotes

I did auditions at a club called the Comedy Connection. They wanted nothing to do with me. But one night they were doing a night of all women comics, and they invited me to do that.

When I started auditioning, I'd take any audition I could get. The more dramatic ones didn't go as well as the comedic.

I've been trying to get into comedy for years. I had a meeting with one of the networks a couple years ago, a general meeting, and when they asked what I was looking for and I told them I'd prefer to do comedy, it was as if I had two heads.

Allison Jones, a big casting director out there, was like, 'They're casting 'The Daily Show' right now - you should submit a tape.' I remember leaving school to go shoot an audition.

If it weren't for The Groundlings, I would never be on Saturday Night Live.

I've been a fan of 'Survivor' for a long time. I even applied for a season. I made a really stupid audition tape. For some reason, I thought if I spoke in a German accent, whoever was casting would think it was funny and put me on the show. But that didn't work!

She said, and I'm not kidding, 'Is this a speaking role?' I wasn't quite sure how to answer that one.

Every city you go to has television and radio talk shows that are dying to give young comics a showcase. They all want to be able to say that so-and-so started here, got his first break on this show.

I did a 'Last Comic Standing' audition in 2006, where you're just performing for three people in a comedy club, in a big comedy club, and I remember them cutting me off, asking about my name in the middle of one of my jokes. Yeah, it's just real weird when you're doing stand-up in that type of sterile, unnatural setting.