I was obsessive-compulsive, and I probably had a little splash of Asperger's in there, but in those days, in 1953, you were just a difficult kid. Attention deficit didn't even exist back then. I really had trouble completing tasks - I couldn't sit still.
I worked myself into a frenzy. By 1996, I had a nervous breakdown just from working. I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, just getting anxiety attacks and all of that stuff because I was doing too much, too young, all the time.
I was diagnosed a number of years ago with obsessive-compulsive disorder - which everyone has, to some degree - and I have this really annoying trait where in conversation, I always steer it back to something that happened to me.
I'm pretty OCD. I like to fine-tune every single detail. I think that's a habit built maybe from me being OCD.
The components of anxiety, stress, fear, and anger do not exist independently of you in the world. They simply do not exist in the physical world, even though we talk about them as if they do.
I'm very comfortable speaking to millions of people, but not comfortable in a small, intimate social setting. Like cocktail hour. I get very panicky.
There's a reason why I do anxious characters - it comes from a lot of personal anxiety. The great thing is, having that history, it's really fun to bring that into the characters... and play with it.
Every day there's a lot of things I block out, because if I start visualising things, I tend to go completely insane. I've always had anxiety issues, and it can totally overwhelm me and suck me under if I'm not keeping focused. I just think and think until I have a panic attack, and then it dies down.
Mental health can be just as important as physical health - and major depression is one of the most commonly diagnosed mental illnesses.
In a way, I had a very good and normal childhood. I had loving and caring parents. But I had a lot of quirks or problems when I was growing up. I had phobias and obsessions.
For years my life alternated between depression and acute anxiety. One night I woke up in a state of dread and intense fear, more intense than I had ever experienced before. Life seemed meaningless, barren, hostile. It became so unbearable that suddenly the thought came into my mind, I cannot live with myself any longer.
Paranoia is an illness I contracted in institutions. It is not the reason for my sentences to reform school and prison. It is the effect, not the cause.
I want to be good all the time, so I feel anxious. But if you weren't like that, you'd be dead, wouldn't you? If you went out happy down the road, la la la. I've never been like that. I don't want to be.
CBT is really a miracle. I've seen it help a lot of people, and one of the reasons I'm speaking out is that I don't feel like enough people know it. Through my work, I constantly come across other people who have various forms of anxiety or panic - it's much more common, I think, than people realize - and not all of them even really know about CBT.
I had some social anxiety when I was younger because I wasn't surrounded by many people in my life.
The thing is, I really like working. If I sit around too much, I get really bad anxiety.
Food can become such a point of anxiety - not because it's food, but just because you have anxiety. That's how eating disorders develop.
Some people feel guilty about their anxieties and regard them as a defect of faith but they are afflictions, not sins. Like all afflictions, they are, if we can so take them, our share in the passion of Christ.
Dealing with chronic anxiety has taught me to better understand the nuances of mental illness and the very individual nature of it.
Depression is anger slowed down; panic is grief speeded up.
Generally I can sleep any time, anywhere, any place, unless I'm anxious about work. I can get performance anxiety, so when I'm on tour it can be hard to sleep.
I have OCD mixed with ADD; you try living with that.
I have a fear of heights and I'm claustrophobic.
When I was younger, there weren't many people that were open about going through anxiety, so I never knew how to deal with it.
I'm a thirty-something ranch wife, mother of four, moderately agoraphobic middle child who grew up on a golf course in the city.
