Amy Tan Quotes

What dragged me down was not being mayor - it was insecurity, the need to be accepted by everyone, the pleasure syndrome. That's what brought me down.

This weird thing that musicians have... it's got something to do with approval, and not feeling good enough, and therefore going out and being great somehow makes your life valid.

People who say they don't care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don't care what people think.

As much as I don't want to admit it, I really am a people pleaser. If I throw a party at my house, it's hard for me to relax. I'm too obsessed with whether everyone's having a good time.

The truth is many of us have been socialized to think that if we are not the very best, if we are not at the top 1 percent of whatever it is we do, then we are not good enough. To reinforce this already pervasive mental model, society has established a competitive hierarchy for just about everything.

I'm surrounded by geniuses, which is really not good for my own personal self-esteem!

Even when I was young, I cared too much about what other people thought, especially girls.

All of my friends are really good dancers, which was initially why I never danced - we'd go out, and they would kill it, and I'd be like, 'Yeah, I'm just gonna sit at the bar.'

Creative people are very insecure people because they don't know whether people like them or are in awe of them. That insecurity always comes out. It makes them a better actor, I feel.

The way you dress or the car you drive or what you spend is to impress other people with how, I guess, successful and rich you are. But you're not, and you shouldn't, and who gives a damn what other people think anyway. So, that mentality, I think, is very destructive.

Conscience in most men, is but the anticipation of the opinions of others.

What if I couldn't handle people's opinions of me? I know that shouldn't dictate a person's degree of peace or happiness in life, but the problem is, I chose a business saturated in judgment.

When I like someone a lot, I get scared that I'll let them down. My fear of sucking is worst when I feel like someone thinks I'm good.

If you have an over-preoccupation with perception and trying to please people's expectations, then you can go mad.

A big element of what they regard as conformity is simply a desire to have an audience.

Growing up, I wanted desperately to please, to be a good girl.

It is definitely somewhat a crutch of feeling that you have to please others in order to be accepted.

You get so afraid of failure and so afraid of losing and so afraid of not being the best that it's not a natural drive - it's born out of fear of failure. Which helps in Hollywood.

It was so draining. Going to parties to rub elbows with so-and-so and act like it's no big deal, when really all I was doing was hoping I'd have the success they had.

There is such pressure on kids these days to be the best at everything.

If we're really honest with ourselves, most of us will admit that we want to impress people, and this is what's causing us to do what we do.

I caved in to what people wanted me to do. I thought that they weren't going to like me if I didn't.

If you go to an elite school where the other students in your class are all really brilliant, you run the risk of mistakenly believing yourself to not be a good student.

One of my biggest problems is that I'm always so influenced by what other people are thinking about me.

You don't realize you're vying for the approval of everyone so much until being yourself is not approved of.