Ann Patchett Quotes

Second marriages can and do create 'real' families.

I've got two families.

As a society, we've evolved, and we've recognized that the American family structure has undergone enormous changes. Divorce is all around us, and who among us doesn't know someone who is divorced or has been impacted by divorce. It's not as scandalous as it was.

Your basic extended family today includes your ex-husband or -wife, your ex's new mate, your new mate, possibly your new mate's ex and any new mate that your new mate's ex has acquired.

Step-parenting and being a step-sibling presents a lot of exciting opportunities. When families break up and re-form, there may be less order, less certainty, and a bit more trauma involved, but kids can end up having half-a-dozen parent figures.

My parents divorced. There was the usual awkward business of going between them, but I was mostly with my mother. She remarried to a Greek painter Nico Ghika, so we were always around artists and intellectuals.

My parents were divorced when I was three, and both my father and mother moved back into the homes of their parents. I spent the school year with my mother, and the summers with my dad.

My mother never married my father. She was married to and divorced from another man, then she married and divorced my stepfather and then, ultimately, they ended up getting back together.

That thing, 'You must stay together for the kids', is out of fashion but is right. It's not arguing parents that children don't like, it is having one parent.

Like all kids with divorced parents, I have an abundance of holidays.

My ex-husband is my family.

I have four kids with three mums, but I'm very close to them all.

And then I have two children by Theresa, one boy 10 and one girl 13.

My parents did divorce, but my dad has always been present for me and loving me and my mom as well when she was alive.

With my stepson, it is very important to me that there is no drama around the fact that he has two families.

I always love the soapy conflicts between somebody's family of origin and their new family - 'Do I have Thanksgiving at my husband's parents' house, or at my parents' house?'

I had a somewhat frenetic childhood because my mum and dad split up when I was five, and then my mum remarried.

I love being a single mom. But it's definitely different when you're dating.

Father or stepfather - those are just titles to me. They don't mean anything.

There are absolutely no problems between me, my dad and my sister. Obviously I grew up with just my mum, but my relationship with my dad is just fine.

I was one of six kids; my grandmother lived with us. We had an aunt who used to have nerves, and all her kids would turn up and live with us.

I was raised by my mom. My dad was always traveling, but she allowed me and encouraged me to be close to my dad. So I grew up with three parents: my mom, my dad and my stepmom. Ninety percent of the time I was with my mom, and 10 percent was with my dad.

Those days of every child having a mummy and daddy who lived at home - Daddy went to work, and Mummy stayed at home and took care of everyone - those days have almost gone, and it's so much more unconventional now.

Divorce, which was once no more than tolerated out of necessity, if that, has now become a right. Everyone is now free to divorce as easily as is possible. Yet it cannot be said that divorce does not infringe upon the rights of others. The rights of children to be raised in a family environment are clearly damaged by divorce, but this is not deemed to be a serious enough infringement to limit the right of divorce

We're fortunate in my family because we really have three families: my brother, David, and me; the two boys, Cooper and Marston, from my dad's second marriage; and my dad's wife, Crystal.