John Fowles Quotes

The essence of being human is that one does not seek perfection.

People accept their limitations so as to prevent themselves from wanting anything they might get.

When I was 25, I believed I could change the world. At 41, I have come to the realization that I cannot change my wife, my church, or my kids, to say nothing of the world. Try as I might, I have not been able to manufacture outcomes the way I thought I could, either in my own life or other people's.

I am good at walking away. Rejection teaches you how to reject.

Of course you can't please everyone all the time. It's just something that I've got to get over, and I'm better at it now.

I can’t hate people for making judgment on me, or making a decision of liking me or not liking me. All I can do is try to better as a person. And I’m good with knowing everything isn’t always going to be perfect.

Important thing to realize is the world is not here to make me happy. When you don't demand that the situation, or place, or person should make you happy, then actually the situation, place, or person is quite satisfying.

When they attack you and you notice that you love them with all your heart, your Work is done.

I wouldn't want to forget anything, even the weird stuff and the bad stuff. It makes you who you are.

I don't rehash the past. It's my baggage. That's all. I accept things as they are.

And have the courage to accept that you're not perfect; nothing is, and no one is - and that's OK.

I'd never understood the injunction not to regret anything, couldn't see how that wasn't cowardice.

The hardest thing to remember is that what we each really want is the truth of our lives, good or bad. Not rocking the boat is an illusion that can only be maintained by the unspoken agreement not to feel and in the long run it never really works. Let go of saving the boat and save the passengers instead.

We never get upset over what happens. Never. We get upset because of preconceived ideas as to what we think should happen, what we want to happen. When our preference clashes with the reality, we get hurt. Rid yourself of all preconceived ideas as to what should happen. You are then at peace whatever happens.

You solve it as you get older, when you reach the point where you've tasted so much that you can somehow sacrifice certain things more easily, and you have a more tolerant view of things like possessiveness (your own) and a broader acceptance of the pains and the losses.

You have to accept the way things are before you can move on.

Do not abandon trust when your ego thinks things should be different than they are.

We're all imperfect, and life is simply a perpetual, unending struggle against those imperfections.

I was going through the hardest thing, also the greatest thing, for any human being to do; to accept that which is already within you, and around you.

What I want is not to want what isn't mine

When we refuse to work with our disappointment, we break the Precepts: rather than experience the disappointment, we resort to anger, greed, gossip, criticism. Yet it's the moment of being that disappointment which is fruitful; and, if we are not willing to do that, at least we should notice that we are not willing. The moment of disappointment in life is an incomparable gift that we receive many times a day if we're alert. This gift is always present in anyone's life, that moment when 'It's not the way I want it!

I would like to understand things better, but I don’t want to understand them perfectly.

I feel like I'm moving from a world where I was creating fantasies that weren't real inside - and very often feeling really dissatisfied - to now living in reality for the first time in my life since I was a kid, and learning to appreciate where I am now while actually sitting with that reality.

You do come to a point where you can get your life in control a bit. But going through life, you discover these deep, dark things in yourself that you can’t run away from, so you have to learn to embrace them. I mean, the difference between a murderer and myself is only that I choose not to do it. But I’m capable.