Paul Simon Quotes

Then she kissed me and I realized she probably was right, there must be fifty ways to leave your lover.

My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend.

It only took one text message to change my life. That's when I discovered my loving husband had been unfaithful. His infidelities ended our marriage.

Men, no matter what their promises, rarely leave their spouses... the louses.

I sleep completely naked to make me believe you are here, but when I wake up it is not the same thing. Most of all, don't deceive me with other women any more.

I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, 'Get off me, you two!'

My first husband was a serial cheater.

Men are more prone to cheating, definitely.

The wife's run off with the bloke next door. I do miss him.

My first husband ran off with Elizabeth Taylor.

Alice: I don’t love you anymore. Goodbye. Dan: Since when? Alice: Now. Just now.

Don't leave a piece of jewelry at his house so you can go back and get it later; he may be with his real girlfriend.

Actually the best thing I did was to get thrown out by my wife. She's living with a fitness instructor. He drinks that yellow stuff in tins. He's an idiot.

This is what divorce is: taking things you no longer want from people you no longer love.

Lipstick on your collar said you were untrue. Bet your bottom dollar, you and I are through.

I got a divorce because my ex-wife left me for another woman.

I never cheated, for the record, back when I was with you. But you believed in everything but me girl, I don't get you

I kissed goodbye the howling beast on the borderline which separated you from me.

Now I lay me down to cheat on the woman I love so, and if I die between these sheets I pray to God she'll never know.

I will be the one to leave you.

Heard you told him that you'd love him 'til the end of time. Now that's the same thing that you told me.

It is with hearts full of sadness that we have decided to separate.

Everybody has been cheated on, everyone will be cheated on.

Some people get divorced, they leave the person for a couple of years, then they remarry. Relationships are very, very strange.

I never cheat unless you count the girls I cheat on