Barbara Kingsolver Quotes

The child supplies the power but the parents have to do the steering.

Re raising kids: Love, without discipline, isn't.

Fathers like to have children good-natured, well-behaved, and comfortable, but how to put them in that desirable condition is out of their philosophy.

I think there's different parenting styles.

I'm a mom... and I'm learning this being a parent, sometimes your child can be such a reflection of who you are. And I have to figure out when it is my ego that dictates how I parent and when it is what I think is best for my child.

I'm just going to try and be a good dad and not spoil the kid: give him love and encouragement but also discipline. Me and my woman, we don't want him to feel too entitled.

Treat your kid like a darling for the first five years. For the next five years, scold them. By the time they turn sixteen, treat them like a friend. Your grown up children are your best friends.

The relation between parents and children is essentially based on teaching.

I want to have a bunch of kids so I can boss them around.

I think having children in general is always very helpful for acting.

My husband's a pediatrician, so he and I talk about parenting all the time. You can't raise children who have more shame resilience than you do.

Caring for children is a dance between setting appropriate limits as caretakers and avoiding unnecessary power struggles that result in unhappiness.

A wise parent humors the desire for independent action, so as to become the friend and advisor when his absolute rule shall cease.

Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.

I set out to write an anti-parenting parenting book.

As much as you don't like disciplining your kids, you have to sometimes. Kids want that structure, that leadership, that guidance. I think that's what I try to give my children.

When my children were young, I was very cocky. I thought I could maintain total control.

Before I married, I had three theories about raising children and no children. Now, I have three children and no theories.

Attitudes about the rearing and education of children vary between two extremes. One, which might be labeled “authoritarian” or “coercive,” rests on an assumption that children are by nature irresponsible and lazy, and will do their schoolwork only if they are penalized for a poor performance. The opposite view might be labeled “progressive” or “democratic.” It rests on the assumption that children who are brought up with love, trust, and clear but kind leadership are eager to grow up and be like their parents, eager to explore, learn, master skills, and take on responsibility; they need guidance but not sternness or punishment.

Having kids certainly gets me to ask the question, 'Who is the adult here, and who is the kid?'

An incredible number of people have raised children who aren't too screwed up. Surely, I won't be the worst at it.

Parenting makes us better in so many regards.

I do discuss things with him, but as a father, not a friend.

I have a big responsibility as a father. That helps me to be more sensible.

I hope all the kids out there who don't like listening to their mothers, who yell and scream at them, that moms are always right just so you guys know.