Dave Barry Quotes

I like to think of Everest as a great mountaineering challenge, and when you've got people just streaming up the mountain - well, many of them are just climbing it to get their name in the paper, really.

I'm a terrible packer. I don't pack lots and lots because I think I'll wear everything, I pack a lot because I never know what I'm going to need. I always go over the weight limit.

Everyone who comes out does a very foolish thing in bringing such a quantity of clothes that he never wants.

I take too much luggage. I'm the kind of person who can't decide whether to pack two or four pairs of trousers, so I usually take them all. I'm getting better but still inclined to take too many items, just in case I need them; I never do.

I think we as women go too far with bags that are super-weighted and I have found that when you give yourself that room to stuff things in you will do it.

The nepotism there is the stuff of legend... It just seems to be a place where people get paid to sit in a building.

People have amazing ideas. The main problem - I won't call it a problem, let's call it a roadblock - is if you use the analogy of a convoy of vehicles going to help a distress situation: they have all the resources needed (food, medicine, everything they need), and as the convoy is traveling, there's a rockslide. You can't get through the road. What good does any of that stuff do when you can't get it to where it needs to go?

A system under which it takes three men to check what one is doing is not control; it is systematic strangulation.

People are hurting. People are suffering. But you can not get everywhere.

We waste our lights in vain, like lamps by day.

With both people and computers on the job, computer error can be more quickly tracked down and corrected by people and, conversely, human error can be more quickly corrected by computers. What it amounts to is that nothing serious can happen unless human error and computer error take place simultaneously. And that hardly ever happens.

I don't want to conquer you; I just want to climb you.

The longer incompetent people delay in doing what they're doing, we're always better off whenever incompetent people are delaying what they're going to do.

Americans are known for their strength, fortitude, and generosity in times of need. We encourage people in the U.S. and everywhere to give with their hearts, reach out to these victims, and donate what they can to the relief efforts.

How impossible it is for us to imagine ourselves victims of disaster. We suffer for the poor people who were thrown into the sea from their cruise ship off the coast of Tuscany, some losing their lives. Imagine a world of accelerating natural disasters, one after the other so that nobody can help anyone else.

We're talking about really vital services to people who are already in a terrible situation and really in need of emergency services - and there aren't alternatives.

There are going to be situations where people are going to go without assistance. That's just the facts of life.

The only thing that deeply frustrates me is the slow speed [of major labels]. The more people involved, the slower the pace.

Just the fact that we can't pass budgets in our Congress, just the fact that we are gridlocked in our own democracy, the fact that everybody who travels can see that we're not investing in our airports, in our rail, in our infrastructure and so forth, people are noticing a United States that is not getting the job done in some ways.

Don’t repeat yourself. It’s not only repetitive, it’s redundant, and people have heard it before.

Inhabitants of underdeveloped nations and victims of natural disasters are the only people who have ever been happy to see soybeans.

Many people are busy trying to find better ways of doing things that should not have to be done at all. There is no progress in merely finding a better way to do a useless thing.

People do not wander around and then find themselves at the top of Mount Everest.

I was late once and it cost me $50,000. I figure it was cheaper to wear two watches.

Quite often people will get an animal which is probably not a good idea for them to have. They get it out of enthusiasm, there is a genuine interest, but sometimes they're not exactly prepared for what they're getting themselves into.