Adina Porter Quotes

No one could save me from the grief of losing my child or losing my first marriage. I had to do that on my own.

I think losing your mother at such a young age does end up shaping your life massively. Of course it does, and now I find myself trying to be there and give advice to other people who are in similar positions.

But she wasn’t around, and that’s the thing when your parents die, you feel like instead of going in to every fight with backup, you are going into every fight alone.

Some widowers are bereaved -- others, relieved.

Drying a widow's tears is one of the most dangerous occupations known to man.

When my first husband died, what I tried to do is to sort of, you know, try to bring some rationale to the circumstance and think about worse circumstances, and also open the door to what other women experienced when all of a sudden they were left alone. And particularly if they had children.

Over the years I've seen people lose a spouse and then withdraw and lose interest in life, and I believe we need to resist that.

A lot of widows feel that they have betrayed their spouse by continuing to live. It's deranged thinking. I know that, but that doesn't stop you feeling it.

When in times of turmoil and breakup, do not cut or shave your head, because it will never end well.

Since Michael died I think I've worked constantly. Friends and colleagues are very sustaining. They're the people who get you through it... It's no good to be on your own.

In some cases, some people do get depressed in the middle of their grief, and they really need to be treated for depression.

In 2002, my husband died very suddenly. My main concern that day was how to deliver the news to our daughter, then eight. Someone put me in touch with Judith Wallerstein, an expert in child psychology who coached me through what to say.

When my father passed away, my mom didn't really know what to do and how to deal with it for me, so she put me in extracurricular classes, one of them being theater.

I've done what I could as far as getting physically healthy after my knee injury, and I've done what I could to get mentally healthy after losing my husband.

I know from experience that one of the first things to drop off during great transitions, such as dealing with grief or loss, is taking care of our bodies.

Ever since my husband expired, I've been even more careful in bringing up my kids, and stayed away from work.

it is a sad truth in life that when someone has lost a loved one, friends sometimes avoid the person, just when the presence of friends is most needed.

Hold on ... Say your son or daughter has just gotten killed in a car accident and you're plastered out of your mind at 3 a.m. Are you going to be able to handle that?

A widow is like a frigate of which the first captain has been shipwrecked.

Grieving, like being blind, is a strange business; you have to learn how to do it. We seek company in mourning, but after the early bursts of tears, after the praises have been spoken, and the good days remembered, and the lament cried, and the grave closed, there is no company in grief. It is a burden borne alone.

Never does one feel oneself so utterly helpless as in trying to speak comfort for great bereavement.

I have to say that since my mother died, I am not the same person anymore. My life has changed a great deal because it's really unbearable to think you can't see her anymore or talk to her anymore.

the final lesson of learning to be independent - widowhood ... is the hardest lesson of all.

That was the hard thing about grief, and the grieving. They spoke another language, and the words we knew always fell short of what we wanted them to say.

I'm sure there's just such a desperate feeling if you've lost a child. You'd probably feel so desperate that you would do anything. Even if they came to the door and put a gun to your head, you'd just be happy to see them.