Roseanne Barr Quotes

One day it was about getting married that mother talked with me, and I said I was so glad that when you didn't like being married, or got tired of your husband, you could get Unmarried.

Unfenced by law, the unmarried lover can quit a bad relationship at any time. But you - the legally married person who wants to escape doomed love - may soon discover that a significant portion of your marriage contract belongs to the State, and that it sometimes takes a very long while for the State to grant you your leave.

I'm not very kind about marriage. I will never get married again.

If I ever try to get married again, shoot me.

It is very difficult to be taken seriously when you're introduced at a party to somebody as the fourth Mrs. Rex Harrison.

Let's not forget, I got divorced.

I'm not convinced about marriage. Divorce is so easy, and that fact that gay people are not allowed to marry takes much of the meaning out of it. Committing yourself to one person is sacred.

Divorce is probably of nearly the same date as marriage. I believe, however, that marriage is some weeks the more ancient.

I met Ashley two weeks before I married him. It was a joke-the most ridiculous thing I've ever done. Once I was married, I didn't want to be a failure, so I stuck it out for six months, which was about six months too long.

I never thought I would be divorced.

I may as well say it, I have been married three times.

I will never get married to the head of General Motors. I will never be the wife of a superstar. For those women, their lives are somebody else's... I will never be a 'Mrs. Blabidyblah!'

The desire to get married, which - I regret to say, I believe is basic and primal in women - is followed almost immediately by an equally basic and primal urge - which is to be single again.

I am a very committed wife. And I should be committed too - for being married so many times.

I'm happy for people who want to get married. It's not my thing.

Marriage is a very good thing, but I think it's a mistake to make a habit out of it.

What a holler would ensue if people had to pay the minister as much to marry them as they have to pay a lawyer to get them a divorce.

If and when we get married, only a completely opposite system will prevail.

I'm not sure I ever want to get married.

I would never want to get married.

Refrain from contracting any marriage forbidden by the law of the land.

I would say that I wasn't so much afraid of marriage as afraid of divorce.

Married in 1983, separated in 1987, and divorced in 1988. Enough said.

It was just a very short period of time that I had a brief marriage.

I never believed in the institution of marriage, because ever since I was young, I had only seen marriages fall apart, or remain stuck in a rut.