Derren Brown Quotes

When you are doing stand-up comedy, you are the writer, producer, director, sometimes bouncer.

I actually opened for Chris Rock at the Funny Bone one time.

No matter what town we went to, if there was a comedian playing, I'd go watch.

Welcome to the Academy Awards, or, as it's known at my house, Passover.

I would love to DJ the royal wedding. Just so I could play Candle in the Wind non-stop.

I'm trying to be a comedian, you know?

As long as there's Big Momma, we're going to bring you comedy.

My primary responsibility is to be funny.

Physical comedy is my favorite thing in the world to do.

I'd like to make you laugh for about ten minutes though I'm gonna be on for an hour.

I don't care about how I look; I'm dedicated to the laughs. You know, I used to be a clown, so - my name was Smoothie the Clown. All the training I had, all my training is geared toward making people laugh, and I didn't care about being cool.

I'm really not an actor of any kind. I've always seen myself as an entertainer, someone who makes people laugh. That's all I've ever wanted to do. 'Doctor Who' has always just been me, really.

The hardest thing in the world to do is to have someone in a seat in a theater laughing so hard that they're making weird sounds.

When I was a kid I went and saw Bill Cosby with my dad, and I remember sitting there and laughing so hard.

I started out as a stand-up comedian. And that's what I'm most comfortable doing.

Being a stand-up is my mission in life; it's my passion. My ongoing goal is to simply be funny, on my own, in front of a roomful of strangers.

It's good to be funny when you are a comedian.

I lived to make Scott Baio laugh.

To be a comedian, you gotta jokesmith, there's no way around it.

I've played comedy before but not that much. I mostly do get drawn to darker material.

I'm a light comedienne; that's really where I live the most often.

Well, I think my stand-up is often kind of visual. Not like Carrot Top visual, but visual.

My job is summer camp. I come and talk and try to make a TV show funny.

My whole life, I've been telling jokes.

I think right now is the best time for stand-up, ever. I sincerely do.