Kenneth Lay Quotes

Trust-me companies are companies whose financial results gallop ahead of their businesses, companies with seemingly perfect control over their quarterly sales and profits. Companies whose financial statements are loaded with footnotes: companies that short-sellers often attack but rarely dent.

The U.S. government uses cash accounting. That is illegal for any enterprise of any size in America except for the U.S. government. Every for-profit business, every not-for-profit business, every state and local government has to use real accounting except for Uncle Sam.

Mark-to-market accounting is like crack. Don't do it.

The banks use rather surreal accounting practices.

The concept of fair value accounting is correct and useful, but the application during periods of crisis is problematic. It's another one of those unintended consequences of making a rule that's supposed to be good that turns out the other way.

The only thing you should do with pro forma earnings is ignore them.

Proper accounting is like engineering. You need a margin of safety. Thank God we don't design bridges and airplanes the way we do accounting.

I don't mean to sugarcoat the figure on restatements, but I think it is positive - it shows a healthy system. The general impression of the public is that accounting rules are black and white. They are often anything but that, and in many instances the changes in earnings came after new interpretations by the chief accountant of the SEC.

Derivative trading with mark-to-market accounting degenerates into mark-to-model. Two firms make a big derivative trade and the accountants on both sides show a large profit from the same trade.

Accounting consequences do not influence our operating or capital-allocation decisions. When acquisition costs are similar, we much prefer to purchase $2 of earnings that is not reportable by us under standard accounting principles than to purchase $1 of earnings that is reportable.

In the corporate world, sometimes things aren't exactly black and white when it comes to accounting procedures.

Basically, financial reporting is this sinking hole at the centre of journalism. You start by swimming around it until finally, reluctantly, you can't fight the pull anymore and you get sucked down the drain into the biz pages.

I would argue that a majority of the horrors we face would not have happened if the accounting profession developed and enforced better accounting.

Professional accountants should use that influence to encourage the companies they serve to think long term and integrate sustainable development goals into their accounting, such as by including a natural capital account, which I have heard is gaining ground.

Liquor - you can make it illegal but you can't make it unpopular.

In the long run managements stressing accounting appearance over economic substance usually achieve little of either.

The Hindus have a peculiar slovenliness in business matters, not being sufficiently methodical and strict in keeping accounts etc.

Whatever your pleasure, I can facilitate. You need weed, you need meth - hey, you need Prozac, I'm your man. I know how you white boys always deal with that depression. I mean me personally, I don't understand what you white boys are all depressed about. Hey, you're white! Smile!

I always felt like I had the word "illegal" tattooed on my forehead.

I enjoy the company of prostitutes for the following reasons: It represses women, it's generally illegal.

Creative accounting is an absolute curse to a civilization. One could argue that double-entry bookkeeping was one of history's great advances. Using accounting for fraud and folly is a disgrace. In a democracy, it often takes a scandal to trigger reform. Enron was the most obvious example of a business culture gone wrong in a long, long time.

I don't know anyone who is not using drugs for the reason that they're illegal.

You can feel bad... I mean, that's not illegal.

We are not accusing you of being illegal, we are accusing you of being immoral.

What do you mean "gangsters"? It's business.