Laurence J. Peter

(Laurence Johnston Peter)

Quotes
Quote Topics Cited
America is a country that doesn't know where it is going but is determined to set a speed record getting there. Miscellaneous
America is the land of taxation that was founded to avoid taxation. Taxes
Bureaucracy defends the status quo long past the time when the quo has lost its status. Time ;Bureaucracy
Education helps one acquires a higher grade of prejudices. Education, Learning, Knowledge & Training
Gerald Ford is the first President of the United States to be elected by a majority of one—and nobody demanded a recount. Compliments, Insults & Rebukes
In a hierarchy every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence. Power
Man is complex—he makes deserts bloom and lakes die. Environment & Environmentalism
Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to believe. Miscellaneous
The noblest of all dogs is the hot-dog; it feeds the hand that bites it. Miscellaneous
When you see yourself quoted in print and you’re sorry you said it, it suddenly becomes a misquotation. Miscellaneous
When you see yourself quoted in print and you're sorry you said it, it suddenly becomes a misquotation. Media, Journalism & The Press
A censor is an expert in cutting remarks. A censor is a man who knows more than he thinks you ought to.
A man convinced against his will is not convinced.
A man doesn't know what he knows until he knows what he doesn't know.
A pessimist is a man who looks both ways when he crosses the street.
Against logic there is no armor like ignorance.
America is a land of taxation that was founded to avoid taxation. Government
An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today. Business, Commerce & Finance
An intelligence test sometimes shows a man how smart he would have been not to have taken it.
As a matter of fact is an expression that precedes many an expression that isn't.
Committees have become so important nowadays that subcommittees have to be appointed to do the work. Work, Workers & The Labor Force
Competence, like truth, beauty, and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder. Truth
Democracy is a process by which people are free to choose the man who will get the blame.
Don't believe in miracles - depend on them.
Early to bed, early to rise, work like hell, and advertise. Work, Workers & The Labor Force
Education is a method whereby one acquires a higher grade of prejudices. Education, Learning, Knowledge & Training
Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent.
Every girl should use what Mother Nature gave her before Father Time takes it away. Time ;Nature
Everyone rises to their level of incompetence.
Expert: a man who makes three correct guesses consecutively. Humor
Fortune knocks but once, but misfortune has much more patience. Patience
Going to church doesn't make you any more a Christian than going to the garage makes you a car.
Heredity is what sets the parents of a teenager wondering about each other.
If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk? Humor
If two wrongs don't make a right, try three. Humor
If you don't know where you're going, you will probably end up somewhere else.
In a hierarchy, every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence.
It's better to have loved and lost than to have to do forty pounds of laundry a week. Relationships
Lead, follow, or get out of the way. Leaders & Leadership
Make three correct guesses consecutively and you will establish a reputation as an expert.
Men now monopolize the upper levels... depriving women of their rightful share of opportunities for incompetence. Women
Nobody can be perfect unless he admits his faults, but if he has faults how can he be perfect?
Originality is the fine art of remembering what you hear but forgetting where you heard it. Humor ;Arts, Culture, Entertainment & Lifestyle
Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing our parents' shortcomings.
Slump, and the world slumps with you. Push, and you push alone.
Some problems are so complex that you have to be highly intelligent and well informed just to be undecided about them.
Speak when you are angry - and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret.
Television has changed the American child from an irresistable force to an immovable object. Science, Mathematics, Engineering & Technology
The best intelligence test is what we do with our leisure.
The great question is not whether you have failed, but whether you are content with failure. Failure
The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway is usually a poor judge of distance.
The seaman tells stories of winds, the ploughman of bulls; the soldier details his wounds, the shepherd his sheep.
There are two kinds of egotists: Those who admit it, and the rest of us.
When in doubt or danger, run in circles, scream and shout.
Work is accomplished by those employees who have not yet reached their level of incompetence. Work, Workers & The Labor Force
You can always tell a real friend: when you've made a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job. Friendship
You can't cross the sea merely by standing and staring at the water. Don't let yourself indulge in vain wishes.